


Regarding Lex

by danceswithgary



Series: Regarding Lex [1]
Category: Smallville
Genre: Alternate Universe - Movie Fusion, Amnesia, Angst, Character of Color, Drama, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-12-07
Updated: 2006-12-07
Packaged: 2017-10-03 23:33:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 19,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danceswithgary/pseuds/danceswithgary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The story of a man who had everything, but found something more. Remix of 1991 'Regarding Henry'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Regarding Lex

  
Cover by laurab1

Part 1

 

Twelve men and women listened intently to the man speaking before them. "Folks, we've been here a long time now, listening to people talk for months. . .complicated medical testimony; a lot of emotion in this case." A grimace of sympathy crossed the speaker's face. "There is not a person in this room who isn't sorry about what happened to Mr. Matthews. It's a tragedy. And, when something like this happens you desperately want to blame someone, don't you? Someone else. We understand that, it's natural."

The lean man pacing slowly and deliberately in front of the jury stopped and looked at them, engaging their eyes before continuing in his low, even voice. "So, what have we got here, what's the bottom line? It's Mr. Matthew's word against the Metropolis General Hospital, isn't it? That's exactly what it is." He turned slowly and indicated the wheelchair bound man sitting with his wife. "Now obviously, any decent human being would *want* to believe Mr. Matthews, believe that he told the admitting nurse Ms. Valdez that he was diabetic. It would seem. . .poetic that someone else was to blame. It would feel right. . .but it wouldn't be fair."

Shaking his head in emphasis, he resumed his careful circuit back and forth, his voice and manner still reasonable. "Let's think for a second, who's being blamed here. It's not some big bad hospital or corporation. We're talking about human beings, four doctors, five nurses. . .the hospital chief of staff present at the time, all of them there for no other purpose than to try and save Jonathan Matthew's life."

Stopping in front of the defense table, he took a sip from the water glass stationed at the edge. Setting the glass down carefully, he turned back around to his captive audience. "Now this is painful and I don't like doing this, but if we're all going to do our jobs I'm going to have to bring this up again. Mr. Matthews is an alcoholic and on the day in question, he tried to commit suicide. And you know, even I was surprised to learn, from the plaintiff's own doctors ironically, that this tragedy could have caused by the abuse of alcohol." Pausing, his body stilled and his voice lowered to the point where all the jurors leaned forward, completely focused on his words and piercing blue eyes. "But here's my point. We all understand *why* Mr. Matthews is blaming the hospital. . .but nobody could have prevented Mr. Matthew's suffering but Mr. Matthews."

Lex concluded his calm and reasoned summation, nodded to the judge and jury, and seated himself next to his colleagues at the defense table. He accepted the admiring glances from Jason and Victoria as his due. He knew he had won this case, just as he had won all of the cases assigned to him since he joined his father's firm. His deceptively youthful appearance and placid courtroom demeanor often lulled his opponents into complacency, while his naked head and slim frame invited unconscious sympathy from juries, leaving them more open to his arguments. When combined, his physical attributes and intelligence made him a legal juggernaut. After the judge finished instructing the jury and sent them to deliberate, Lex excused himself and went into the hallway to check his phone messages.

Disposing of a number of messages about pending cases, Lex decided to make a final call. In the middle of his conversation, Lex nodded to several attorneys walking past before continuing, "…listen to me. The table you delivered is not the table I ordered." His voice rose and he hissed in anger. "I'm having a party Friday night and the table sitting in my dining room looks like a goddamned turtle. Fix it." Turning the phone off, Lex dropped it in his briefcase and took a deep breath. Smoothing down his perfectly tailored suit and straightening his designer tie, he headed back into the courtroom and took his seat in time to hear the verdict.

"We find for the defendant on all counts."

Jason leaned over and whispered, "That was quick." Lex inclined his head arrogantly and rose from the table. His eyes skated over the devastated faces of the Matthews, dismissing them as unimportant. He began shaking the hands being offered to him along with congratulations on his victory.

 

. . .

 

The celebration continued back in the high-rise offices of the firm. Morgan Edge, the white-haired senior partner of Edge, Luthor and Hardwick passed an overfull flute of champagne to Lex who offered a toast, "To Mr. Matthews, everyone. Bottoms up."

Tapping his flute against Lex's before drinking, Edge refilled their glasses and proposed his own toast. "Like father, like son."

Downing his second without pausing, Lex nodded his head. "Yeah, the old bastard would have loved this one."

Edge's lips twisted wryly. "Only if he'd pulled it off." The rest of the gathering laughed politely and Lex excused himself, citing cases requiring his attention before he could leave that day.

. . .

Grabbing his overcoat, briefcase and his ever-present tumbler of scotch from his desk, Lex left his office, gesturing to his secretary. Jessica followed her employer down the hallway to the elevator, her grey hair bobbing as she trotted alongside in her sensible shoes, noting his instructions for the next day. "If Maxwell calls, the billing hours are short, tell him he owes me fifty. Cancel my lunch, I'm going to work through it and move the dinner to next week. Pull the file on Briggs vs. Gordon."

"What about the Rosenburg. . ."

Lex overrode her question. "Let me finish, please. I need the Martinson deposition on my desk by nine o'clock tomorrow morning. Call Mr. Kent and tell him I can't make dinner at six-thirty." He drained the tumbler, handed it to Jessica and entered the elevator. "Have him call the Whosits and make it seven-thirty instead."

The elevator doors closed on Jessica's quiet affirmative, "Yes, Mr. Luthor."

 

. . .

 

". . .because you're responsible." Standing in the doorway of his daughter's room, scotch in hand, Lex pointed at Lena and delivered his lecture in a barely controlled voice, his eyes narrowed in anger. "If you can't learn to respect other people's things, then we're going to have a big problem. Now you're not to leave this room tonight. Understand?" The eleven-year-old redhead sitting on her bed nodded silently, her eyes reflecting her distress. Lex left the room, closing the door behind him.

A tall dark-haired man clad in a well-cut suit met him in the hallway. "The sooner we get there, the sooner we can leave. You ready?" Preceding Lex, he paused at the entrance of the kitchen to speak to the housekeeper. "Rosella, we'll be back in a few hours."

She paused in her task to smile and wave. "Enjoy yourself, Mr. Clark, Mr. Luthor."

Lex followed him to the apartment door, set his empty tumbler on the table in the foyer and put on his overcoat. His companion asked, "Keys?"

Lex patted his pocket, nodded and walked out of the apartment calling back brusquely, "Come on Clark, we'll be late."

 

. . .

 

The cab ride to the dinner party was silent; the two men abandoning any attempt at conversation after Lex informed Clark that he had won the Matthews case. Clark had simply nodded, not offering any praise. On arrival they separated, each pursuing their own agenda. While Lex glad-handed government officials and business owners in search of endorsements and potential litigation, Clark employed his charm to obtain donations for several non-profit organizations he was affiliated with, including Metropolis Legal Aid.

 

. . .

 

The return trip was equally silent, both men at the opposite ends of the back seat, preoccupied by their thoughts after a long day. Exiting the cab, Lex went ahead, letting Clark take care of the fare. Lex ignored the doorman, simply walking through the open door while Clark took the time to smile and greet him, "Good evening, Eddie." The doorman tipped his hat and smiled back. "Have a good night, Mr. Kent. . .sorry, I mean Clark."

Dropping his keys on the foyer table, Lex looked through the archway into the dining room. He grimaced at the sight of the offending table. "God damn it." He stalked over to it and ran his fingers across it. "If Tracy doesn't get this table replaced tomorrow, I don't want you dealing with her anymore."

Ignoring Lex's rant about inappropriate furniture, Clark followed him into the room. "You should apologize to Lena."

"Did you tell the caterer we're sixty now?"

Clark insisted, "Lex, go tell Lena you're sorry. You never apologize."

Moving around the table, away from Clark, Lex finally sighed, "OK." He shuffled down the hall to Lena's room, listened for a moment, and then opened the door. There was just enough light from the hallway for Lex to make out Lena's tear-stained sleeping face. When he walked into the room and sat on her bed, Lena stirred and then pulled herself up onto her elbows. She waited for him to speak.

Taking a deep breath before speaking, Lex began his quiet apology. "I was angry. I admit I was angry, but with a reason. My piano is very important to me." He reached out to pet the floppy stuffed animal cradled in Lena's arms. "It's like your doll. Frank's your baby. How would you feel if I spilled grape juice all over your baby?"

Lena looked down and mumbled, "His name isn't Frank."

Exasperated, Lex's calm voice began to rise. "Lena, the point is if you can't be responsible, don't take food out of the kitchen." Recognizing he was letting his control slip, he took another deep breath before continuing with a self-satisfied smile. "I finished a really big case today and guess what? Daddy won." Bringing his focus back to his daughter, he asked, "OK, all better?" He waited, but Lena said nothing. Frowning he prompted her, "Remember, 'Qui tacet consentire videtur'." Still receiving no response, he nodded and translated the Latin, "He who is silent is understood to consent." Lex patted Lena's shoulder and leaning forward placed a quick kiss on her cheek. She pulled away and laid down, rolling over to turn her back on her father. Lex didn't notice. He had already left the room, closing the door firmly behind him.

Returning to the living room, Lex headed for the bar only to stop with a curse. "Damn it, I told Rosella to pick up more scotch."

Clark placed the book he'd been reading on the table beside him. "I want to talk to you about Lena and her enrollment in Excelsior next semester."

Lex, busy rummaging under the bar, dismissed Clark's request. "There's nothing to talk about. We agreed years ago that having her attend my old prep school was the right choice. She's been accepted, the tuition is paid in full and there's no need for further discussion." He straightened up behind the bar and frowned at Clark.

Clark protested, "But Lena's unhappy about…" He started to stand as he spoke.

Lex quickly headed for the door, grabbing his overcoat along the way. "I'm going to run down to the store and get a bottle right now. If I hurry, I'll make it before they close." Deceptively casual, he added, "You don't need to wait for me to get back before you go out tonight. Rosella can keep an eye on Lena."

Ignoring that suggestion, Clark subsided back into his chair. Picking his book back up, Clark reminded Lex, "Don't forget your keys." Lex grunted and left, but before the door could close behind him, he pushed it back open and grabbed his keys from the table.

 

…

 

Checking his Rolex, Lex was pleased to see he had made it to the store with five minutes to spare. The bell over the door jangled as he pushed his way inside. The clerk at the register did not look over at the sound. All of his attention was on the disheveled young man standing in front of him.

Frowning at the limited selection behind the counter, Lex pointed at an acceptable bottle. "I'd like the J&amp;B Rare, please." When the clerk failed to move, he raised his voice and repeated his request. "You there, a bottle of the J&amp;B Rare now, not next year."

The young man turned from the mesmerized clerk to Lex and raised the hand that had been hidden from view. Eyes widening at the sight of the small-caliber handgun, Lex groaned. "What a fucking day."

Waving his weapon, the gunman demanded, "Give me your watch!"

Lex shook his head and raised his hands in a placating gesture, "Wait a minute." A sharp report echoed in the store. Lex stared down in shock at his shirt where blood was spreading rapidly just above his heart. Looking back up at the strung out gunman, he tried again. "Will you just wait a minute?" He started backing towards the door, only to be halted by another shot.

A whisper. "Clark."

Just inside the store's doorway, Lex's body collapsed in slack-muscled disarray, eyes staring up blankly, a small bloody hole centered above his right eyebrow.

 

***

 

Part 2

 

***

 

"Don't forget your keys."

Clark only winced a little at the door slamming behind Lex. He knew what Lex was doing and it wasn't going to work this time. They needed to talk about some very important decisions to be made, not just about Lena and her school. What Lex didn't know was that Clark had already arranged to stay in this evening. He wasn't going to get out of the discussion by claiming Clark wasn't available when Lex was ready to talk. Clark was going to be there, waiting, when Lex walked back through that door.

Abandoning his book, Clark stared into the fireplace. Sometimes Clark wondered if Lex had cremated his moral yardstick along with Lionel's body three years ago. Where he would once assess his actions and moderate them to avoid acting like his father, he now seemed to go out of his way to surpass Lionel's unethical behavior. He had become ruthless, his courtroom tactics heartless, with no regard to the human fallout. It was absurd how incompatible they'd become after all these years. Clark spent his days and nights trying to help people in need while Lex simply tried to accumulate power and money for himself. Their lives needed to change or their lives needed to be separate.

Thankful for the soundproofing that allowed him to rest undisturbed by the constant noise of the city and its inhabitants, Clark rested his head on the back of the chair while he waited. Reviewing the donations and pledges he'd obtained for his favored charities at that night's gathering, his eyes gradually drifted shut.

The doorbell woke him with a start. Rubbing his face, he glanced at the antique clock above the fireplace, startled to find Lex had been gone almost 2 hours. The doorbell rang again. Muttering, "Just glue the keys to your hand, Lex," a disgruntled Clark rose to answer the door. Flinging it open, he was surprised to find two uniformed police officers standing in the hall.

The older officer spoke. "Mr. Kent?" At Clark's puzzled nod, he continued. "You were listed as the emergency contact for a Mr. Alexander Luthor. I'm sorry to have to tell you he was shot tonight during an attempted robbery. He's been taken to Metropolis General in critical condition."

. . .

 

Clark was not accustomed to feeling powerless. His first thought when he heard about Lex was Superman needed to fly him to the Fortress for treatment. That impulse had been thwarted by the presence of the officers. He'd been able to convince them to leave quickly, and then he stood outside the apartment, listening for Lex's heartbeat. It was there, faint but steady. Knowing he was still alive calmed Clark enough to be able to wake Rosella and tell her he was heading for the hospital. He flew to the hospital immediately, but found he was still unable to extract Lex safely. Despite his concern, even close to panic, Clark had understood transporting a patient, who was currently under surgery to remove bullets to the brain and the chest, would be ill advised. Now he was waiting for the results of the multiple surgeries, relying on faith and hope, just like the humans sharing the chaos of the dismal waiting area.

After his first 'look' at Lex in surgery, Clark restricted himself to listening for his heartbeat and breathing. Seeing Lex so still and vulnerable, his skin flayed open and his brain exposed was more than Clark could take. All the disasters he'd responded to and the horrific injuries and deaths associated with them had not spawned anything close to the overwhelming despair and guilt Clark had felt at that moment. His single-minded monitoring left him unaware of the passage of time until the mid-morning arrival of his friend Diana.

Diana was finally able to convince him to visit the restroom to wash his tear-stained face and to make a quick call to Rosella and Lena. As he returned to the waiting area, he heard his name called. "Mr. Kent? Is there a Mr. Kent here?" He resisted the urge to speed up to the orderly waiting for someone to respond, limiting himself to waving his hand as he approached. "Mr. Kent, please follow me." Clark looked to Diana for reassurance, which took the form of a quick hug, a whisper that she would take care of 'things', and then a gentle push towards the doors being held open for him.

 

…

 

"…and Morgan stopped by with Victoria to see if we needed any help. I told them we were fine and that I'd let them know if anything changed. Oh, I got the Christmas tree set up last night in the corner where we always put it. I pulled out the boxes of ornaments and Lena and I are going decorate it tonight."

The continuous beeping and whooshing of the machinery attached to the still figure in the bed were the only sounds in the room when Clark stopped talking. He gently squeezed the hand he was holding, wishing he felt more than fragile bones and slack muscles. This person with the bandages on his head and tubing everywhere wasn't his Lex, the vibrant man who was never still. Even while sleeping Lex was restless, rarely in one position for more than a few minutes. Now there were no movements except those made by someone else rearranging his limbs as needed.

 

. . .

 

The bandages had been removed, leaving a livid scar above Lex's elegant brow. Fewer machines crowded the bed, but silence still reigned save for a single weary voice.

"Lena got her school uniform today and tried it on." Clark tried to chuckle, "She looked at me and said, 'Papa, I don't *feel* smart'." The result was closer to a sob. Clark's guilt about not being there to save Lex from injury was only heightened when the AI at the Fortress explained that it had no special treatment methods for brain injuries and that it would be best to leave Lex under human care. There would be no miracle cure. Now it was up to time and Lex's ability to heal. Diana had tried to help by reminding him it was Lex's idea to soundproof the apartment when Lena had arrived, that Lex always insisted that Clark couldn't continue to save others if he didn't take care of his own needs. All Clark knew was he needed Lex to wake up and tell him that he was forgiven.

"It's time for some entertainment. I brought Dickens today. Somehow, I thought 'A Christmas Carol' would be appropriate." Clark smiled as he thought of how Lex would have quirked his lips at the sly innuendo. "Let's begin. . .Stave 1. Marley was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that. . ."

 

. . .

 

"OK honey, you can open one present now and then I want you to get ready for bed. I'll be home soon."

Clark hung up the pay phone, frowning at the hospital's restriction on cell phones. He rested his head against the wall for a few seconds before straightening up and returning to Lex's private room. He sat in the chair next to the bed and reached for Lex's hand, searching his face for any improvement. The scar was much paler, a thin raised line. Only a single IV ran into Lex's vein now, for the hydration and nutrition his quiescent body required.

"Lex, I know you can hear me and I want you to know I'll be right beside you whatever happens. Lena and I need you. You need to fight this. You just have to reach down inside and use that Luthor stubbornness and pride and strength and win. That's what you do, Lex. Make it happen." A tear made its way down Clark's cheek, dropping to their clasped hands when he bowed his head. "We want you back home with us." He lifted Lex's hand and kissed where the tear had landed. His lips against pale skin he whispered, "I still love you. Please, please come back to me. I'll do whatever it takes to make us work again. Please."

 

…

 

"I'll see you tomorrow." Clark stood and then leaned over to press a kiss on Lex's unresponsive lips. Exiting the room, he passed the night nurse, on her way in to check Lex's IV and vitals. "Good night, Mary."

"Good night, Clark. And a Merry Christmas to you and Lena."

Clark merely waved in acknowledgement and walked towards the bank of elevators. Mary continued into the room and checked the IV drip before reaching for Lex's wrist to check his pulse. Looking up at his face, she saw that his eyes were open and as she watched, he blinked. "Well, hello sweetheart! Let me just get someone important back in here." She dropped his hand back on the bed and rushed from the room. She saw the tall form still waiting for the elevator to arrive. "Clark! Come back here! Quickly!"

The nurse had re-entered the room by the time Clark made it back, controlling his impulse to speed. When he walked in, he immediately saw the change. Not only were Lex's eyes open, but it was as if his body regained some semblance of life, despite a lack of any overt movements. "Lex?" Clark moved to stand next to the bed. "Lex, can you hear me?" He touched the nearest hand gently.

Lex's head moved to the side, responding to either the caress or the sound of Clark's voice. Clark could not restrain a gasp of dismay when he saw no sign of recognition in the dull eyes above a slack, drooling mouth.

 

***

 

Part 3

 

***

 

"Mr. Kent, your...your...Mr. Luthor has been incredibly lucky. The bullet wound to the head caused minimal damage." The chief neurologist got up from his desk and flipped on the viewer for the CT scan and pointed to an area obviously different from the remainder of the scan. "See, here in the right frontal lobe, it's the only part of the brain that has redundant systems. If you're going to get shot in the head, that's the way to do it." Clark waited for him to sit back down, saving any questions for later. "But I can't lie to you...I wish I had all good news. The other bullet hit the subclavian artery. There was...excessive internal bleeding and cardiac arrest. Mr. Luthor suffered anoxia, that's a lack of oxygen to the brain, and the anoxia caused some damage." The doctor looked down at the open folder on his desk, flipped a page and then looked back up at Clark. "What I'm getting at is that it's going to be a long, tough rehabilitation."

Clark struggled to keep his emotions in check. "How long?"

"We'll know a lot more in three months." Shaking his head in commiseration, the doctor explained. "The brain is very mysterious. Even though your...Mr. Luthor seems to have the capacity to recover there's no telling how well or how long it might take. In some ways, he's starting from scratch here. Mr. Kent, he can't speak, he can't move, his motor skills aren't functioning properly. His memory might be *deeply* affected. Certainly one day everything might come back, but there are no guarantees." Closing the folder, the doctor concluded his consultation. "He might not be able to regain his speech or physical coordination...ever."

 

. . .

 

Clark and Lena sat down for a quiet dinner at the same table that had irritated Lex so much that fateful day.

"How's Daddy?"

Clark took a moment before answering. "I know you haven't seen him since he woke up, but he's really doing great, honey. The rehabilitation clinic is going to be a lot better than the hospital." He smiled, patting Lena's hand. "Even better, I know the person who's going to be working with him and he's really good."

Lena rearranged the food on her plate. Clark knew this meant she had something she wasn't comfortable saying, so he finally prompted her. "Honey, what's wrong?"

"Do we *have* to visit him there?" When she heard the catch in Clark's breath she hurried on. "I mean, it's been so...he hasn't been here to get mad...never mind. Sorry." Before Clark could come up with a response, another question tumbled out. "Could we get a puppy?"

Eyes suspiciously red, Clark smiled sadly. "We'll see."

 

. . .

 

"How about this one?" Lena held up a sapphire blue pullover for Clark's approval.

"It's perfect. It brings out your beautiful eyes. Daddy will love it." He smiled at her as she pulled it over her head, and then pulled her close for a hug, smoothing her ruffled curls. She looked up at him and he was caught by the brilliance of her eyes, so like her father's. He missed those eyes that had gazed up at him in wonder on the banks of a river, the same eyes that would smile at him over a cup of coffee, grew stormy during an argument or became lazy and dark with passion.

"Papa?" Lena grew concerned as Clark stared down at her, unmoving.

Clark shook himself out of his reverie. "I'm sorry, honey. Let's get going, we're going to be late. It's a long drive out to the clinic."

 

. . .

 

"Morgan called yesterday. He said this is a really great place and he's heard good things about it from a number of people. He also said he can't wait to throw you a welcome home party. And for the five-hundredth time he wanted me to tell you that everything's under control and to take your time, *but get back immediately*." Getting no response from Lex, whose head was turned away to stare out the window, Clark left the side of his bed to look outside. "It's so pretty and quiet here, isn't it?"

"Hello, Mr...Kent, is it?" A middle-aged doctor with a pleasant smile bustled in, flipping through a chart. His bright eyes took in the room and its occupants. "I'm Dr. Marlow, Chief of Staff."

"Please, it's Clark." He left the window and shook the doctor's hand.

Dr. Marlow nodded and moved towards the bed where Lex was lying with his head elevated. "And this must be Mr. Luthor." He patted Lex's hand, observing his delayed reaction, waiting for Lex to look at him. "How is everything going? Well, if you have any complaints about how you're being treated, I'm the boss here. You just come straight to me." Spotting Lena standing in the corner, almost hidden by the open door, he exclaimed, "What a beautiful little girl!"

Clark drew her forward and introduced her. "This is Lena."

"How old is she?"

"She's almost twelve." Lena gave the doctor a timid smile.

Echoing her smile, the doctor returned his attention to Lex. He pointed to Lena. "Is this your little girl, Mr. Luthor?" Lex's eyes tracked from the doctor's face to Lena and came back to the doctor with no indication he recognized Lena. Clark pulled Lena close to his side. The doctor tried again. "Alexander..."

Clark corrected him. "He prefers Lex."

The doctor nodded, "Lex, Do you remember your daughter?" Still no sign was visible beyond a narrowing of Lex's eyes and an almost puzzled look. The doctor grasped Clark's arm and moved him closer to the bed. "Do you remember...Clark?"

Lena concealed her tears in Clark's coat as her father struggled to keep an encouraging smile on his face for the confused man in the bed.

 

. . .

 

"Papa, why do I have to go to Excelsior next term? Why can't I stay here in Metropolis?" Lena was pouting as she got ready for school.

"Lena, we've talked about this. Your father really wanted you to attend Excelsior. It was very important to him that you attend the same school he did and he was so proud that you'd been accepted. He's going to come back to us and he'll need to know we haven't changed things while he was gone, that our plans and our future are still there and waiting. We need to make this happen for him. Okay, honey?" Clark bent down to give her a hug.

"Okay. I'll try."

"That's all I'm asking. Thank you, honey." He gave her a kiss on the cheek before releasing her and grabbing her backpack. "I love you. Now, we need to hurry or you'll be late."

 

. . .

 

"Where are Rosella and Lena?" Diana had settled into a chair in front of the fireplace with the cup of coffee Clark had offered her.

"Rosella has the weekend off and is visiting her daughter. Lena is staying the weekend with a friend. And I get to be a bachelor. After you leave I'll be on my own for the first time in...in my life, if you don't count those months I was at the Fortress training." Clark sat down with his own cup and took a sip. "It's a really strange feeling when I think about it. Parents, college dorms, Lex, then Lena and Lex, I've always had someone to come home to, someone there, even if it was just Rosella when Lex was out-of-town."

Diana smiled sympathetically at her friend. "How is he doing?"

Clark set his cup down as his hand started to shake. "He...he doesn't know who we are, Diana. Not me, not Lena. Every day I went to the hospital and talked to him and promised him that we'd make it. And then he woke up and I thought 'Yes, it's going to be alright, we're going to be together again' and I kept on talking to him just like the doctors and therapists said to...and he doesn't know who I am." A sob broke through, but Clark hadn't finished. "Sometimes the worst part is walking into his room and a new doctor or nurse looks at me and wonders who I am. And I introduce myself as Clark Kent and it doesn't mean anything to them except I'm this name on a piece of paper that says I get to make the decisions about Lex's care." Clark jumped up from his chair and started to pace. "Do you know how many times I've had to listen to them search for a word to use instead of husband or boyfriend or life partner? Instead, they fumble and then just use my name. I suppose I should be used to it after all these years, but it hurts and then I feel selfish because why should I care about something as petty as what I was...what I am to Lex when he...when..." Clark dropped to his knees and buried his head in Diana's welcoming lap, sobbing. She wiped away her own tears and let him cry, stroking his hair gently.

 

***

 

Part 4

 

***

 

Lex watched as the young woman placed blocks in different colors and shapes on the tray positioned over his bed. He listened intently as she asked him to locate the correct block.

"Mr. Luthor, can you show me the circle?" When he looked at her, she pointed to the tray and repeated, "Show me the circle?" Lex lifted his right hand and pointed to the large block shaped like a circle. "Good, now where is the triangle?" Lex pointed to the blue rectangle. "Close, but I'll give you a hint. That's wrong. The triangle is green. Can you find the green triangle?" Lex tentatively pointed to the correct block. "Good!"

Their session was interrupted by the appearance of a muscular black man pushing a wheelchair. His face split by a friendly grin, he breezed into the room and introduced himself. "Mr. Luthor? The heck with that! Lex, you probably don't remember me yet but I'm Pete Ross, Clark's friend from Smallville." He reached over and helped the other therapist pick up her blocks and moved the tray. "Thanks Red, I'll take over from here." She said goodbye to Lex and left the room.

"Yeah, Clark and me, we go way back and he asked me to take over your treatment. So here I am, and I'm a whole lot better than all the king's horses and all the king's men because I *am* going to put Humpty Dumpty, that's you, back together again. So let me introduce you to your new friend." He pointed to the wheelchair. "You and me and that wheelchair are going to be best buddies until you're back up and walking again." He extended his hand palm up for Lex to slap. "Right?" Lex looked at it. Pete picked up Lex's right hand and dropped it on top of his and grinned. "Right!"

 

. . .

 

After a gossip-filled transit down the hallway, with Pete greeting patients and nurses alike, they ended up in the physical therapy unit. Pete carefully moved Lex to a padded table and began putting him through a series of stretches to reawaken muscles wasted by months of inactivity. Gently forcing the left leg up and back towards Lex, Pete ended up facing him in a compromising position. He laughed. "Don't go getting any wrong ideas about this, Lex. It isn't because I like it." Lowering that leg, he repeated the action with the right. "It's to get you back in the swing, playing basketball and jogging ten miles a day." He lowered the right leg and patted the knee. "I'm afraid you're not going to have too many secrets left when we're done here."

 

. . .

 

Leaning over the wheelchair as they strolled through the sunny garden, Pete teased Lex. "I hear from the speech therapist you haven't been talking much, that true?" Lex twisted his head to look at the laughing face. "Tell me Lex, is that true or just a nasty ass rumor?' Lex managed to shrug. "Hmmm. I guess it must be true then." They continued on with Pete filling the silence with observations on everything and everyone they met.

 

. . .

 

"Hey, Clark!" Pete and Lex came wheeling into his room, almost knocking into Clark.

"Hi Pete." Clark bent over to give Lex a quick hug. "Hi, Lex. How's it going?"

Pete answered Clark as he maneuvered Lex back into bed. "The sessions are going pretty good, he's getting a lot of his range of motion back and is lifting weights. We're going to start him walking on the trainer soon."

"That's really great to hear. I'm glad I caught you. I usually come earlier in the day, but Diana's picking Lena up from school, so..." Clark looked at Lex and made a decision. "Can we go somewhere and talk?"

"Sure. Lex is pretty tired after our sessions and will probably be asleep in a few minutes. We'll go grab a cup of coffee." Pete finished settling Lex and made sure his call button was in reach. "See you later, buddy." Lex gave a small wave and closed his eyes.

Pete closed the door and they started down the hallway. "Hey Clark, something wrong beyond having your man down and out?"

"No, it's just that I'm worried about what he might remember and whether he'll say something without really meaning to...and I feel awful about thinking that way."

"Nothing to worry about Clark, he isn't talking...yet. When he does start, I'll keep my ears open and let you know if any rumors start floating around. Being worried is perfectly understandable. If it got out, then the three of you would need to start over somewhere else and that just wouldn't be right." Pete reached over and patted Clark on the shoulder in reassurance.

"Could you do one thing? If he asks you any questions, don't lie to him. I don't want to break that promise I made him. You don't have to volunteer information, unless you want to, just please don't lie and let me know as soon as possible. Okay?" Clark's face turned to Pete's, the strain and worry visible in his eyes.

"What are old friends for? Now let's get that cup of coffee and argue about the Shark's chances this year." They turned the corner and headed for the cafeteria. "And then you need to get back and spend some quality time with that man. Don't want him making any moves on me because he's lonely." Like a ghost from the past, Clark's laughter drifted back down the hallway.

 

. . .

 

"I'm telling you Lex, you are the talk of the therapists' lounge. Between looking half your age and how fast you're bulking up, they all want to know your secret. They're even starting to call you Superman, just like that guy you want to watch all the time on the news." Pete laughed as he finished placing the free weights back in the rack before positioning Lex in front of his walker. "Now, all we have to do is get you talking and we can think about getting you back home with Clark and Lena. Besides, wouldn't it be nice if Clark wasn't always the one doing the talking? Man, you've got to be tired of all those one-sided conversations." Lex lifted his head from his concentrated effort to move the walker across the room, one excruciatingly slow step at a time, and gave a twisted smile and nod to Pete. "Well, I think I might have just the thing to get the words flowing. Let's finish up here and I'll treat you to breakfast at the cafeteria."

 

. . .

 

After leaving Lex at one of the tables, Pete prepared a tray for him. Taking a large scoop of scrambled eggs, he added an over-generous portion of hot sauce to them, mixing it in carefully while winking at the server behind the counter. He carried the tray with the eggs, orange juice and large glass of water back to the table and set it down in front of Lex before sitting down himself. Lex started eating the eggs only to stop with his mouth open, breathing hard, eyes watering. He spit the half-chewed mass back onto his plate and started making an effort to speak, something he had not done previously, "H...H...H."

Pete sat there with a wide smile and calmly asked, "What is it, Lex? Something wrong?"

"H...Hot!" Lex scrabbled for the glass of orange juice, drinking it as fast as he could before repeating, "Hot! Hot!"

"That's it, Lex. Tell me about it. Tell me what you want to eat instead of those nasty eggs." Lex looked at Pete, struggling. "C'mon Lex, I know you've been out to eat at a lot of fancy places. Think about it. Ever been to a high-class hotel?"

That seemed to spark something in Lex. "R...R...Ritz. Ritz!"

Pete laughed. "All the possible food in the world and you want crackers. Well Lex, if that's what you want, then that's what you'll get! Let's go find some Ritz crackers and maybe we can see if we can catch Superman on TV, buddy!"

 

. . .

 

"Pete, why am I...?" Lex slid his hand over his head before grabbing back onto his walker. The two men were outside enjoying the sunshine as Lex worked on his walking exercises. As they passed other patients, Lex greeted them as often as Pete did, with a smile and wave.

"Why are you bald? Let's see...to make it easier to get ready for work in the morning?" Pete gave one of his ready grins. "No, that's not it. Well, your lack of hair is the result of getting caught in the famous meteor shower in Smallville."

"Smallville?"

"Yeah, where Clark and I grew up, town of the bizarre and unusual. It seems your dad brought you along with him when he came out from Metropolis for some real estate deal and you ended up in a cornfield close to where one of the meteors hit." Pete walked a few more steps. "It's odd, but that actually turned out to be the first time you and Clark met."

"Clark? I don't know anything about him or L...Lena. He comes to visit me almost everyday, but...I don't remember so he talks and I listen. I...I don't know what to say when he talks about people or things I don't remember. I think I might...like him, but...I'm not sure."

Pete shook his head. "Lex, you've got to ask him questions when you don't know something. He can tell you a lot about your life together that I can't. All I know is what Clark's told me, like how the Kent's took you and your Dad to the hospital that day and that Clark was there. Anyway, your hair fell out and it never came back."

"Oh, okay." Lex fell silent and didn't speak again until another patient went by with a nurse. "Hi, Mr. Pasquale. Hi, Maria. Nice day, isn't it?"

 

. . .

 

"Hey, Lex, what're you doing? You're supposed to be packing." Pete breezed into Lex's room and stopped, waiting for Lex to look at him.

Lex pulled his paintbrush back from the large canvas in front of him and smiled at Pete. "Painting. Crackers and Superman." He stepped back from the bright painting of a Superman standing by a Ritz cracker box, which matched several other canvases scattered around his room. A suitcase was open on the bed, only partially packed with the scattered clothing and DVDs.

"C'mon Lex, we've talked about this before. You need to take advantage of the fact that you're back up and functional in a third of the time that any of the doctors estimated. It's time to go home, buddy."

"I'm not going, I changed my mind." Lex put his paintbrush down and frowned. "I want to stay here with you and Mr. Pasquale and Dr. Marlow and all the other patients."

"Clark and Lena are coming to pick you up. You're going home."

"I live here."

"This is just a pit stop. You've got a beautiful home."

"But what about you?"

"I've got my job here, Lex. They're going to take care of you. They love you."

Lex lost his temper and pushed the easel over. "I don't want them to take care of me! I want to stay here with you!"

"Lex. Calm down. It's going to be fine." Pete grabbed Lex's flailing arms and gentled him.

Lex's chin dropped and he mumbled. "I can't remember. I don't know those people enough. I don't want to go with them."

A gasp from the doorway brought both Pete and Lex around to see Clark and Lena standing there. Lena's face revealed nothing and Pete was reminded of the times he'd seen her father's face do the same when he was determined not to show any emotion. Clark struggled to maintain his usual smile, but Pete saw the tears standing in his eyes, just waiting for the right moment to fall.

"Hey, Clark. I'll just take Lena for a soda." Pete reached for Lena's hand and walked out, leaving Clark standing in the room.

Clark held out his hand to Lex and said gently, "I think it's time for you to come home."

Lex shook his head. "I already told Pete..."

"You don't want to come home?"

Lex's tone was petulant. "What about Pete?"

Clark put everything he had in trying to convince Lex to come home. "Pete can take care of himself. You've got us and we're going to help you every way we can. You've got a life back home with friends and family. All you have to say is...you want to come home."

"I don't want to."

 

. . .

 

Standing outside Lex's room, Pete took Lena's soda and turned her face up to him. "You know your Dad didn't mean to make you feel bad, right? Why don't you go in and talk to him."

She shrugged and feet dragging, went into the room. Lex was sitting on the end of his bed, struggling to tie his athletic shoe. Lena walked over and stood in front of him. She bent over and taking the laces from him, showed him how to tie them. "Make a loop, then another loop, crossover and pull through." Straightening up, she smiled at him.

Lex looked at Lena in wonder. "How did you do that? How did you know how to do that?"

"*You* taught me."

Lex stood up, excited. "It was gray carpet. I remember gray carpet. Where was that?"

"It was at home."

 

. . .

 

Clark sat discouraged in front of Dr. Marlow's desk, listening to the doctor's calm voice. "We've already discussed this. I think it might be premature for Lex to go home. He should *want* to go home first."

"I just want what's best for him." Clark's face reflected his dismay.

The doctor gave Clark an encouraging smile. "Clark, I know it can be disappointing talking with Lex and not having him respond as much as you'd like. Just keep trying, keep talking to him just as you would have before and when he does go home, you need to make sure his old routines are followed. Everything you keep the same...familiar, gives him another chance to make a connection and possibly bring back some memories. He's made amazing progress already. I'm sure it will continue when he gets home and is surrounded by pieces of his everyday life."

Suddenly, Lex appeared in the doorway of Dr. Marlow's office. "I remember gray carpet! I want to go home." Clark's grin was wider than he'd ever seen before and Lex thought that maybe he wanted to see that again, sometime soon. Smiling back shyly, Lex returned to his room to finish packing while quietly repeating under his breath, "I remember gray carpet."

 

. . .

 

Pete wrapped Lex up in a big hug. "You take care of yourself, Lex. Don't forget to do all your exercises, right?"

"Am I going to see you again?"

"Of course you are. We're friends."

"Promise?"

"Of course I promise. Now get on home."

"Right, I'll remember my exercises. I'll miss you, Pete." Lex pulled away reluctantly and climbed into the front passenger seat while Lena sat in the back behind him. "OK, let's go!"

Clark gave Pete a quick hug and whispered, "Thanks Pete, you're the best."

Pete smiled and patted his back. "Just remember, he says what he's thinking right then to *anyone* listening, so be careful what you say if you don't want it repeated. Let me know how it's going. Okay?" Seeing his nod of understanding, Pete stepped away from the car as Clark got in and started the engine. The passengers waved at Pete as the car left the clinic grounds.

"Bye. Hey Lex, don't forget! Superman rocks!" Lex watched out the back window until Pete's upraised hand was no longer visible and then turned around, looking forward to starting his new 'old' life.

 

***

 

Part 5

 

***

 

Clark carried Lex's suitcase and canvases through the door being held by the building's doorman, closely followed by Lena. "Thanks Eddie." "Hi, Eddie."

"Hi, Clark, Lena."

Lex came in last, looking around at the building entrance and at the door before stepping through. Eddie greeted him. "Good to see you, Mr. Luthor."

Lex stopped in front of the doorman and hugged him. "Hi, Eddie." Startled, Eddie let go of the door and watched in amazement as the three entered the elevator and headed up to their apartment.

Lex fidgeted as they waited for the elevator to open, and then followed Clark and Lena into the apartment. Once inside, Clark set his armloads down and watched as Lex walked through the spacious rooms. Looking up at the high ceilings and large windows, his mouth opened in amazement. "Wow, nice place!" Peering into the dining room, he declared, "I like that table," before moving on to the kitchen where Lena introduced him to Rosella, who he insisted call him Lex.

Clark stood listening to the sound of his reunited family, and smiled.

 

. . .

 

Lex came out of the bathroom fumbling with the buttons on his blue cotton pajama top. Looking up he saw Clark already in bed, wearing matching pajamas, with a book in his lap. Clark set the book aside and asked softly, "Are you coming to bed?"

Lex blinked. "I'm going to sleep there? With you?"

Patting the right side of the bed, Clark nodded. "Yes, this is your side."

Timidly, Lex crossed the room and climbed into the bed, lying back against the mound of pillows. After a minute of shifting restlessly, he started pulling pillows out from behind himself and throwing them onto the floor until just a single one remained.

Grinning at the pile of pillows on the floor, Clark leaned over Lex to turn out the light and then gently settled down with his head pillowed on Lex's chest. Lex, unsure of where to put his hands, finally dropped one to the bed and allowed the other to rest lightly on Clark's head. The tension slowly bled out of his muscles and, after a minute or two, his fingers combed through the soft curls beneath his hand. He whispered into the dark, "I remember your hair."

Clark stopped holding his breath, closed his eyes, and smiled.

 

. . .

 

Clark woke feeling more rested than he had been in months. He looked over at Lex who was still asleep, his face peaceful and serene. Content, he watched him for a while, seeing relaxed muscles where they were once taut, at ease instead of always poised for movement. Reluctant to wake him, Clark slid carefully from the bed and headed for the bathroom.

When Clark emerged fresh from his shower, he was greeted by the sight of Lex perched on the side of the bed, rubbing his eyes and yawning. When he spotted Clark, he straightened up and ventured a smile. "Clark?" At Clark's answering beam, he stood and approached him. "I'm hungry. Can I have breakfast?"

"Of course! Why don't you take your shower and get dressed and I'll have Rosella start breakfast. Lena leaves for school in about an hour, so I've got to make sure she's moving." Unable to resist a warm, sleepy Lex, Clark pulled him in for a quick hug before leaving the room, closing the door behind him.

Lex made his way into the bathroom where he found towels and toiletries laid out for him. He managed his shower without mishaps and wrapped in the robe he found hanging behind the door he stood in the center of the room, unsure where his clothing was stored. He wasn't left to wonder long. There was a tap on the door and then it opened, Clark's head peering around it. "Lex? Oh, you're done. I'm sorry; I just realized you wouldn't know where your clothes are. Let me show you."

Walking to the side of the room, Clark pushed on a small handle and slid a large door into the wall. This revealed a large walk-in closet with a number of shelves, cupboards, and drawers in addition to the rods holding suits, shirts and pants. Lex's mouth dropped open at the sheer volume of clothing choices. Clark pulled open one of the drawers and indicated underwear and socks, a second drawer containing long sleeve t-shirts and a third containing lightweight sweaters. "This rack is mine..." Clark pointed to a sparsely populated section and then indicated the remaining items. "...and these are yours."

Lex was confused. "Why do I have so many clothes? And where are the rest of yours?"

"You wear different clothes than I do for work. I don't need very many because I work here, at home. You went to the office everyday. It's OK, just pick out whatever you feel like wearing." At Lex's look of panic, he reassured him, "Here, I'll help. How about this pair of pants and one of these shirts?" Lex took the casual pants from Clark, pulled a light blue t-shirt out of the drawer, grabbed a pair of boxers and socks and almost ran from the closet. Clark followed him, but left the door open. "Maybe you can come back in later and look through the clothes." Lex just nodded and finished dressing, slipping on a pair of loafers Clark had brought out with him. "OK, let's go eat."

Clark led the way to the kitchen, where Lena was already eating a bowl of cereal. She waved her spoon at Clark and Lex, her mouth full. Clark pointed to Lex's usual chair and they both sat down. Rosella brought a large pan of scrambled eggs to the table and started to serve Lex. He stopped her saying, "No, thank you, I don't like eggs."

Lena, Clark and Rosella all looked at him in surprise. "But you always eat eggs," said Lena before Clark could stop her.

Lex looked at all of them, shrugged and then told Rosella, "Oh. OK, then give me lots of eggs."

Lena's glass of milk was a casualty when she reached for it while still watching Lex. She immediately started mopping up the mess with her napkin, apologizing profusely, almost panicking in her haste. Lex reached out to still her frantic movements and reassured her, "That's OK, I knock things over all the time." He followed that astonishing statement with an equally surprising action, knocking his own juice over deliberately. Three mouths dropped open in shock, staring at him until Clark finally jumped up to grab a sponge and dealt with the spreading pool of orange juice and milk. Flood averted, the remainder of breakfast proceeded without further mishap, although more than one giggle issued from Lena and Lex when they looked at their empty glasses.

 

. . .

 

"Now you're sure you don't want to go with me?" Clark was holding the door open for Lena as she put her backpack on. "After I take Lena to school, I'm going to stop at my publisher's for a meeting, run some errands and then swing back to pick Lena up from school. She only has half-days this week, and then she's off for the summer."

Lex shook his head. "No, I'd like to stay here and look around some more. I have to do my exercises too." Clark hovered for a few seconds before he heeded Lena's pleas to hurry as she bid Lex goodbye.

"OK, all the numbers are programmed in your phone if you need anything. Bye..." Clark's last words were cut off by the closing elevator door. Lex closed the apartment door and started exploring.

 

. . .

 

"Rosella, what did I used to do when I was home?" Lex had finished his inspection of the rooms and had ended up in the kitchen watching Rosella clean.

"You were never home, Mr. Lex, you were always working."

"But I must have done something when I wasn't working."

"No, you were always working. I always felt sorry for you, always having to work. Even when you went out with Mr. Clark, you were working."

"Oh." Lex left the housekeeper to her chores and wandered back into the bedroom he and Clark shared. The open closet beckoned him and he took a deep breath and entered. He opened every door and drawer, flipping through clothes, fingering silk ties and examining suits. One drawer yielded a box containing a watch with a Napoleon franc face. It somehow felt familiar, so he pulled it out and strapped it on his wrist. A money clip sitting beside the box and containing several hundred dollars went into his pocket. He opened the last drawer to find an odd device, similar to a cell phone but with no buttons for dialing numbers. He tossed it back into the drawer and left the closet, not sure what to do next.

Walking down the hall, he saw Rosella open the door to a delivery boy. She instructed him to wait while she got his payment and Lex slipped past him and into the waiting elevator before Rosella returned. Walking out of the building, he greeted Eddie with a wave. "Hi Eddie. I'm going for a walk because I told Pete I would do my exercises. Bye."

The puzzled doorman waved back without a word, watching Lex as he disappeared around the corner.

 

. . .

 

After a close encounter with car bumper while crossing the street, a hotdog with everything, and an uncomfortable twenty-minute venture into an x-rated movie theatre, Lex came to a stop in front of a pet store. After tapping on the window, he smiled, opened the door and entered.

 

. . .

 

"We're home!" Clark let the door shut behind him as Lena dropped her backpack by the door. Rosella came to the door of the kitchen and smiled at them. "Hey Rosella, where's Lex?"

"I think he's in your room, Mr. Clark."

Clark walked down the hall, eager to see how Lex's day had gone. The bedroom was empty, as was the bathroom and study when he looked. He stopped and listened, identifying Rosella and Lena's heartbeats and voices, but no Lex. Starting to get worried, he used his x-ray vision to scan the apartment, but found only two skeletons. He returned to the kitchen. "Rosella, did Lex go out? I can't find him anywhere."

"No, Mr. Clark. He went into your room and I haven't seen him since."

Clark headed for the apartment door, intending to step outside the soundproofing and listen for Lex. As he opened the door, he narrowly avoided colliding with Lex who was juggling a lively beagle puppy, a dog bed and a bag of puppy chow. When he saw Clark, his face lit up and Clark didn't have the heart to be angry at him for leaving the apartment alone. He relieved Lex of everything except the puppy who was promptly placed on the floor amidst the joyous squeals of an ecstatic Lena who came running in.

Lex and Lena sat together in the middle of the floor petting the puppy that was enthusiastically licking both their faces. Lex grinned at Lena and then up at Clark. "I think we should call him Buddy."

 

. . .

 

"Papa? Papa, can you help me with this knot?" Lena called down the hallway, her hairbrush in her hand. As Clark came out of the study, he held back, watching Lex approach Lena, holding out his hand for the brush. She looked at him warily, and then handed it to over. He took her hand and led her to the sofa in the living room, where he sat down with her seated on the floor in front of him. He carefully pulled her head back so it rested on his knees and spread her red curls out. Buddy hopped into her convenient lap and Lena giggled. Clark stood in the doorway of his study, enjoying the sight.

Section by section, Lex worked the hairbrush through the bright curls, making sure not to tug or pull. The rhythmic strokes were soothing and his eyes grew distant. "I think I used to brush my mother's hair. It was red, just like yours."

"Sometimes I wish I had different hair. The curls get all tangled and the color is too different from everyone else's."

"I hated mine too. My mother would brush it for me and then I would brush hers and it would make me feel better." Lex shook himself as if shrugging off the old memories and ventured a joke. "I guess you won't be able to brush mine for me. Maybe I should get some wax and you could buff it."

Lena twisted around to look in his face, disturbing Buddy. Fending off the puppy's determined attempts to lick her face she asked, "Daddy, why did you bring home Buddy? You never wanted us to have a dog before."

Clark returned to the study, delighted to see the two so engaged with each other. Lex had told Lena that it seemed like the right thing to do at the time. Clark could live with that.

 

. . .

 

"Lena, Clark, hurry! It's on now!" Lex sat in front of the television, impatiently waiting for the two of them to join him. "I've seen this one before and it's really great." Lena carried in a large bowl of popcorn while Clark managed the drinks. They sat on the sofa on either side of Lex and settled in to watch the special that Lex had insisted they watch. Clark and Lena smiled at each other as Lex pointed out the parts of the show he liked and filled them in on them everything he knew about the Justice League, including his particular favorite, Superman. "They try to save people without being paid to do it. They just want to do the right thing. Superman is the best, even though he hasn't been around much this year. I'll bet he's doing something top secret and really important and that's why no one has seen him."

 

"I think you're right, Daddy. Superman is doing something really important right now."

 

. . .

 

Looking around the library, Lex finished counting the light fixtures for the third time. He looked across the large wooden reading table at Lena who was intently copying information from an encyclopedia and ignoring him. He crumpled up a piece of scrap paper and tilting the book open in front of him, he used it as a launch pad for the wad of paper, flicking it at Lena. She looked up and whispered, "Daddy, stop it." Lex decided the trajectory was off, so he re-positioned the book and successfully hit Lena in the head on his second try. "Daddy, stop it. I'm serious."

Lex grinned at her and rolled his eyes. "I know. Very serious." He flipped a few pages of the book, but after Lena lowered her head again, another wad of paper took flight.

"Daddy, just read your book," Lena hissed in frustration.

Her anger disappeared when Lex's face lost his teasing grin and his eyes grew troubled. "I can't."

 

. . .

 

Clark paused outside Lena's room, listening to Lena and her father reading together. He was thrilled to see the two spending so much time together and that they had been given the chance to re-build a relationship that had been badly damaged. He left the two lying across Lena's bed on their stomachs, Lena coaching Lex through sounding out the words in one of her first books, 'Are You My Mother?' and headed to the kitchen. He wanted to make sure there was something special waiting for teacher and student when they emerged victorious.

The apple pie was just coming out of the oven when Lex and Lena came running into the kitchen. Clark had just enough time to set it down safely before Lex wrapped his arms around him in an exuberant hug. "I can read!" Laughing at their excitement, Clark returned the hug and gathered Lena in too. All three bounced up and down until Rosella announced they had a visitor.

"Well, you all look happy."

All three turned to look at the tall, dark-haired man standing in the kitchen doorway. Clark was the first to recover. "Hi, Bruce. This is a surprise."

"I didn't mean to interrupt your celebration. I just thought it was about time for me to stop by and see how Lex was doing." Bruce looked at Lex's bewildered face before addressing Clark. "Why don't Lex and I go into the study and get to know each other again?" Searching Bruce's calm features for a clue, Clark finally nodded and told Lex he would be in the kitchen with Rosella and Lena if he needed anything and that he'd be in with pie and ice cream in about twenty minutes.

Looking around the study before taking a seat, Bruce noted the absence of the lead crystal decanter that once held Lex's well-aged scotch. Lex opened the mini-fridge under the bar and asked Bruce if he would prefer water, juice, or soda. Accepting a blue bottle of water, Bruce waited for Lex to sit down. "You're looking well, Lex. How are you feeling?"

"I feel good." Lex tilted his head as his brow furrowed. "I'm sorry, but I don't remember you. Were we friends before?"

"We've known each other since we attended Excelsior together. We don't see each other as often as we used too, but you and Clark and Lena have visited Wayne Manor several times. In fact, Alfred sent you this and apologized that he couldn't bring it himself. He hasn't been feeling well lately." Bruce handed Lex a brightly wrapped package.

The silver frame that emerged from the wrappings held a photo of a happy Clark and Lena posed in front of an imposing mansion. "This is a wonderful picture. Who took it?"

"Alfred. He dabbles in photography among other things. He thought you might like it, he took it the last time they visited."

Lex frowned. "They visited? Was I in the hospital?"

"No, it was a few months before your injury. You were too busy to take time off and Clark and Lena...needed some time away. Alfred is always pleased to have visitors and I hope you can all come to stay soon." Pausing, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small device. After looking at the display, he rose from his chair. "I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to take a rain-check on the pie and ice-cream. It's too bad, Clark learned from the best."

Still trying to absorb the information he'd received, Lex accompanied him to the door. "I'll have to ask you to say goodbye to Lena and Clark for me." Bruce shook his hand in farewell. "Lex, I'm really glad to see you're doing so well. I remember you were a good man once and I think that man is still inside you. I hope that's true, because Clark and Lena need you to be that man. Take care."

The dark man was gone before Lex could say a word.

 

. . .

 

"And this is me after I lost my first tooth. Papa tickled me and made me laugh so the hole in my teeth would show in the picture." Lena pointed to one of the pictures in the album lying open on her bed.

Lex flipped the pages of another album as he sat on the floor next to Lena's bed. "You were so cute there. I think all these pictures of you are great. Did I take any of them?"

"I'm not sure, maybe some of the early ones. Papa took most of the others or Grandma Martha did." Lena's smile drooped a little at the mention of her grandmother.

"Grandma Martha? Who is she? Is there a picture of her?"

Lena pointed to another album on the floor and Lex handed it to her. She located a picture and turned the album to show Lex. "See here. That's Papa and Grandma Martha and Grandpa Jonathan and me. I think this is one of the pictures you must have taken."

Lex stroked the picture showing four smiling faces in front of a yellow house. "She has pretty red hair and a nice smile." He looked up at Lena. "Where do they live? Will they come and visit?"

Lena's lip trembled, but she kept her voice steady as she told Lex about their last visit to Metropolis and how they were killed by a drunk driver on the way home to Smallville. "Papa said they would be glad they were together at the end and that we should always remember the happy times with them. So I remember making cookies with Grandma and feeding the cows with Grandpa."

Lex was quiet for a few minutes as he looked at their pictures. Sighing, he turned a few more pages before asking Lena another question. "Did you ever want a baby brother or sister?"

Her face grew still. "I stopped asking for one when I was eight years old."

"Why? Didn't you want one anymore?"

"No. I didn't want Papa to look so sad because I asked." Lena looked down and drew a pattern on the blanket with her finger. "I heard you and Papa arguing one night after I went to bed. Papa wanted another baby, but you said they were too much trouble, that they needed too much time and you didn't want to go through all that nonsense again. You told Papa that you had other things that were more important to you."

Lex caught his breath. He couldn't imagine what he had thought more important than caring for the beautiful child sitting in front of him, let alone the chance of having another one to love. "I'm sorry." He reached out to rub Lena's leg where the skin showed between her pants and her sock. He felt a raised line under his fingertips and pointed to it, asking Lena what happened with his eyes.

She gave him a little smile. "Skateboard."

Holding her hand, Lex raised it to trace the scar above his eyebrow. She leaned forward slowly, his eyes closed, she kissed the reminder of his lost past and he felt forgiven.

 

***

 

Part 6

 

***

 

"Lex, you're a walking, talking medical miracle. I'm very happy everything is going well for you. Now, any questions from either of you?" Dr. Marlow leaned back in his chair and waited for Lex and Clark to answer. Lex shrugged and shook his head. Clark opened his mouth as if to speak, then changed his mind. Dr. Marlow nodded his head and made a suggestion, "Lex, why don't you see if Pete is around? He might like to chat with you and Clark." Lex smiled at the thought of seeing his friend again and left the office quickly. Dr. Marlow repeated his earlier question. "Is there something you'd like to ask me about?"

Clark thought a moment. "We've been careful about not trying to force Lex to remember things and waiting for him to ask instead of just telling him about the past. It sometimes surprises me when just seeing or hearing something triggers a memory and then he has it. He was able to start reading again after spending a just few hours with Lena, as though he was just rusty and needed oiling."

Dr. Marlow nodded, "Yes, he has done amazing well and I hope it continues. Remember I couldn't promise he'd get anything back, let alone the amount he has."

"It's great. It's just that sometimes he gets frustrated because something he remembers isn't exactly the same. For example, we painted the study while he was in the hospital and it was confusing him because it didn't match the rest of what he recalled happening in the room. Should we avoid changing anything, avoid changing any plans until he remembers?"

Thinking for a moment, Dr. Marlow ventured his opinion. "Change is inevitable, a fact of life, and Lex will need to learn to deal with it. On the other hand, frustrating him too much might hold back his progress. I would suggest you include him on decisions as much as possible so that if something changes, it will be expected. You're already doing that; he's able to take care of himself, dress, eat..." Dr. Marlow chuckled, "...handle money for important purchases like puppies. The rest will take time but seeing how well he's done so far, I have the utmost confidence that you'll all do fine."

 

. . .

 

"Lex, are you almost ready..." Clark came to a halt just inside their bedroom door as he caught sight of Lex dressed in his tux. "You look great."

"I'd look better if I could remember how to tie one of these," grumbled Lex, frowning at his mangled bow in the mirror.

Clark came up behind him and put his arms over his shoulders to help hold the ends of the tie. "Here let me show you, just like you showed me for my prom." He guided Lex's hands through the motions, the result a perfect bowtie. Smiling at him in the mirror, Clark thought Lex looked the same as he did that day, so many years ago. Turning him around, he admired the finished outfit and placed a light kiss on Lex's lips. "Beautiful!" He left the room calling back, "Hurry up or you'll be late to your own party."

Lex stood still in the center of their bedroom and touched his lips in wonder.

 

. . .

 

"'What am I going to do with that boy?', Lionel said, 'I've grounded him, but I don't know what else to do with him.'" Morgan stood at the head table, recounting a story about Lex and his father. "'Are you kidding? Grounded him!' I said, 'I want that boy in the firm!'" Pleased with the polite laughter, he looked down at Lex, who was seated next to him. "And as it turned out, it was the best decision I ever made." Raising his glass, he continued. "For years our halls have resounded with the call of Lex Luthor, throwing on his jacket, striding through the office crying, 'Come on guys, let's go out and break some balls!'" Another spatter of laughter rose from the guests as he concluded, "I offer a toast for the years to come, when once more we'll hear that familiar cry."

"To Lex!" echoed through the room as everyone toasted the guest of honor and then applauded.

Clark leaned over to whisper in Lex's ear as the ovation died and he rose from his seat. Turning to the seated guests, he admitted, "Clark told me I should get up and say a few words." He waited for the mirth to subside before beginning. "Um, I don't remember...any of you. I don't really...remember very much of anything. It's all mixed up. Um, like I remember that Lena likes strawberries on her pancakes, but I don't remember any...of her birthday parties, although I saw pictures and I was there. I remember a woman in a blue dress standing on grass. Um, I think it was my mother, but I don't know that it's my mother. Um, so...so if you'll just be patient...I'm trying."

Clark reached for Lex's hand under the table as he took his seat, squeezing it gently until the applause ended and the murmurs dwindled to nothing.

 

. . .

 

"Call if you need anything, I'll be here." Clark leaned forward to bestow the quick kiss Lex had come to expect. "Remember, we love you."

"Bye." Lex gave a small wave as he stepped into the taxi, and then he was gone.

Clark and Lena waved until the taxi was out of sight, and then returned to the apartment. "I'm going to miss him Papa. Do you think he'll be OK without us?"

"He'll be fine and if he isn't, he'll call. He promised." Clark sat down behind his desk, while Lena dropped into the overstuffed chair on the side. "I'm going to miss having him here too. It's been nice. But going back to work was important to him, even if it's just part time for now."

Twirling one of her curls around her index finger, Lena brought up a new subject. "When are we going to tell him the rest?"

Clark sighed. "I don't know. I'm not sure if he's ready yet, but if he does ask you about anything he might hear or see, send him to me. I'll tell him everything he needs to know. We're not going to lie to him. We'll just have to be careful. OK?"

"I understand. I got a little worried the other day when he started telling some lady at the grocery store what we had for dinner and where he works and a lot of other stuff she didn't ask about. He's getting better, but..."

"I know, honey, but we need to let him try to be as normal as he can be. It's the best thing for him and we have to support him." Pushing himself back in his chair, Clark opened up his arms. "Now give me a hug before you take Buddy for his walk."

Waiting until the door closed behind Lena, Clark opened his laptop and reviewed the alternate identities Bruce had set up for the three of them, in case Superman's family was ever exposed. When Lex asked, he would give him everything he had, all his secrets, even if it meant leaving this life behind and starting over somewhere else.

 

. . .

 

Jason accompanied Lex to his office, introducing people as they came up to welcome Lex back. As they approached Victoria's office, she came to the door. "It's good to see you back, Lex." Her face looked sad, not matching her words.

"Thank you..." Lex looked to Jason who supplied the name, "...Victoria." A nod and they continued down the hall. She surreptitiously wiped away a tear as she walked back into her office and closed the door.

An earnest young man extended his hand to Lex, overemphasizing his phrasing as if Lex was mentally handicapped. "Hello, Lex. My name is Rudy. Rudy. I just want to say hello and welcome back." Lex shook his hand gingerly and continued down the hall.

"What is it with that guy?" he asked Jason.

"Rudy? Oh, he's an asshole."

"OK."

At the end of the hall, an open doorway led into an outer office where an older woman stood waiting for them. "Lex, this is Jessica, your secretary. She was working for Smithson while you were out."

"It's good to have you back, Mr. Luthor."

"Hello, Jessica." Lex leaned forward to sniff the orchid pinned to her suit jacket. "Nice flower."

She gave a surprised smile, "Thank you."

Jason had reached the inner door and opened it with a flourish. "And *this* is your office. I'll catch you later. Enjoy."

Lex's jaw dropped as he walked into the spacious 'corner office'. The ceiling-to-floor windows on two sides overlooked the city, flowers sat on the bar beside crystal decanters and a leather sofa was flanked by two matching chairs. Lex walked to his pristine desk and sat down. "Wow."

"Would you like a cup of coffee, Mr. Luthor?" Jessica had followed him in and was waiting for instructions.

"Yes, please." He looked down at the single large case sitting on the desk. "Matthews vs. Metropolis General Hospital." He opened it and started reading from the beginning.

Jessica set a cup and saucer down in front of Lex and began to pour from the carafe she held. "Say when." She continued to pour as Lex watched, finally stopping just before the cup overflowed. She looked at Lex and said kindly, "When you've had enough, Mr. Luthor, you say 'When'."

Lex looked from her to the cup and said, "When."

 

. . .

 

Clark stuck his head into the study where Lex was bent over the Matthews case file, a ruler helping him read the fine print. "Want anything from the kitchen?"

Not looking up, Lex answered absently, "No, thanks. I'm OK."

"A little milk and cookies? Mallomars?"

Lex sighed, "No, I have to finish reading this."

Clark walked over to the desk and leaned over. "You don't remember Mallomars, do you?"

Lex looked up. "No."

"Marshmallow and chocolate. Mmmm." Clark licked his lips. "I watched you go through a whole package once in three and a half minutes."

Wide-eyed, Lex stammered. "O...K, I'll have...some."

A few minutes later, Lex still wasn't sure which was sweeter, the kiss or the cookies.

 

. . .

 

"So we'll push for October. We can go to trial then." Victoria looked around the room for approval of her suggestion.

Morgan interjected, "What about Lawson?"

Victoria shrugged. "He's on the Barnes case."

"How long could that take?"

"Lawson? Try a decade." Victoria's smirk made it clear what she thought of that suggestion.

Jason was curious. "What did he say?"

Rolling her eyes, Victoria replied, "Nothing intelligent. I'm telling you, you've got to make a choice."

Another of the senior partners objected. "What? Postpone? We can't push this off forever."

Victoria was adamant. "Either we get it or we don't. The call has to be made here."

Morgan made his decision. "If we lose Rogers, a half-dozen other clients will follow. We can't lose this case because of Barnes."

Pleased at her success, Victoria rose from her chair to shake hands with Morgan. "So we go in September and they won't know what hit them."

He nodded. "Exactly, we pull a Lex Luthor."

Lex, who had silently fidgeted with a pen through the entire conference, didn't understand why the others found that statement amusing.

 

. . .

 

Holding back after all the others had left the room, the senior partner, who had objected to the postponement, praised Morgan. "It was really decent of you to let Lex come back like this."

Morgan graciously acknowledged his own generosity, "Well, after all, we're human, aren't we."

 

. . .

 

Lex came out of his office and asked Jessica, "Is there any more on this...Matthews vs. Metropolis General Hospital?"

Surprised that Lex hadn't used his intercom, Jessica told him, "That would be in the file room. I'll go get it for you."

"OK, I'll wait here."

Giving Lex a kind smile, she gently prompted, "You can wait in your office; I'll bring it to you."

Embarrassed at his error, Lex ducked his head. "OK, I'll wait in my office."

 

. . .

 

"...going to Paul, White?" Victoria looked up from her conversation with Jason to wave Lex to their table. The restaurant was filled with the usual lunch crowd.

Jason nodded to her question. "They offered him six figures and a partnership."

Victoria was amused. "I'd have to see the office first."

A waiter materialized behind Lex and assisted him with his chair, handing him a menu. "It's good to see you back, Mr. Luthor."

After indicating his choice, Lex looked at his companions in concern. "Listen, I have some questions."

Victoria placed her hand on top of his solicitously, "What is it?"

Pulling his hand away, Lex pulled a case file out of his briefcase and put it on the table. "On this case."

"Which one?" Jason asked.

"Matthews vs. Metropolis General Hospital."

"Your famous last case," Victoria nodded in recognition.

Fumbling a little, Lex tried to explain his question. "We said that...the hospital wasn't responsible because...Mr. Matthews didn't tell them he was...a diabetic."

Jason agreed. "That was the argument; that they weren't responsible because they didn't know the guy was on insulin."

Lex shook his head in agitation. "But look in this file, this other patient, Miss...McNair said that she heard Mr. Matthews...tell the nurse he was diabetic but she...didn't write it down. So we're saying they're not...responsible, but we didn't...tell them about this lady's statement."

Jason shrugged. "So what. Come on Lex, put it away. Put it back in the file."

Lex stilled in distress. "So, what *we* did was...wrong."

Jason failed to understand Lex's concern. "What we did is paying for our lunch."

 

. . .

 

"...mix until smooth. Add chocolate chips and drop by teaspoonfuls on greased cookie sheet." Nibbling on chips, Lex looked up from the recipe at Lena. "Maybe we could make just one big cookie?"

She grimaced, "No, that doesn't work. We tried it once and it was awful." Shrugging, Lex grabbed the stick of butter and started greasing the sheet. Watching him, Lena tentatively asked, "Were you scared at the hospital?"

"At first, but then it got OK." Lex set the butter aside and starting dropping the dough on the sheet.

After watching him for a minute, Lena blurted out, "I start school soon. It's sleepaway and I've never been to a school like that before."

Startled, Lex dropped the spoon into the bowl. "What? No one told me." Cookie dough forgotten, Lex studied his daughter intently. "Are you scared?"

"A little bit." Eagerly, she asked Lex, "Do you still want me to go? Because I *could* go to school around here instead."

"Well, of course I don't want you to go. I'd miss you." His face fell. "But I'm not sure it's up to me. Is it up to me?"

Lena shrugged, unsure.

"I'll talk to Papa about it, OK?"

 

. . .

 

"Lena and I made cookies." Lex put the plate of cookies down on the desk where Clark could reach them easily. Clark grabbed one and made appreciative noises. Lex waited for him to finish chewing and drink some of his milk before he asked his question. "Lena says she's starting at Excelsior soon. Does she have to go there? She won't be here everyday and I'll miss her."

Clark stood up and came around the desk to avoid the appearance of Lex asking permission for something from a superior. Stopping in front of him, Clark considered his answer carefully. "Sending Lena to Excelsior was something you had planned for years. You went there and you wanted your daughter to continue the tradition. You were very happy when she was accepted, and paid the tuition in full, immediately."

Lex studied Clark's face. "Did *you* want her to go?"

"No, to be honest, I didn't. But, my opinion and Lena's protests weren't enough to change your mind." Clark frowned as he recalled the discussion. "As a matter of fact, I wanted to try to talk to you about it again that night, but..."

Lex regarded Clark warily. "You could have just cancelled her enrollment without telling me. Why didn't you? It's not like I remembered that decision."

"But it wouldn't have been right. You're her father and you need to be able to make these decisions and know they won't change just because you're not around to enforce them."

"Aren't you her father too?"

Clark shrugged. "That's what the adoption papers say, but sometimes..."

"So, two fathers should be able to make joint decisions about their adopted child."

"I adopted her, Lex. She's your biological child."

"I don't understand."

Taking Lex's hand, Clark drew to one of the chairs and urged him to sit. He took the opposite chair and leaned forward. "Please don't say anything to Lena about this, Lex. It could hurt her. Someday she might want to know the whole story, but not now. Can you do that? Can you try not to talk to her about her mother?"

Lex nodded. "I would never want to hurt her."

"There's no easy way to say this. Lena was the result of a one-night stand. You were angry with me and got very drunk and had unsafe sex. Her mother came to you a few months later and demanded money to have an abortion. After the paternity test came back positive, you came to me and said you wanted to keep the baby and I agreed to adopt her. You paid the mother to carry her to term and then she signed over all custody rights to you for quite a large sum." Clark's hands curled into fists. "No child needs to be labeled an 'accident'. I wanted her very much and so did you and that's all that is important."

Lex's face reflected his confusion. "I don't even know what other questions to ask. I'm all jumbled."

"I understand. Take your time. Just remember I will answer every question you ask me and I will always tell you the truth, even though it might hurt sometimes. OK?"

"OK." Lex rose from his chair. "I think I need to take a walk now."

"All right, I'll be here if you want to talk more later on." Clark watched Lex leave the room walking carefully, as if he wasn't sure if the ground was really there under his feet. After he heard the apartment door close behind Lex, he buried his head in his hands and tried not to think about all the tough questions that were still out there, waiting to be asked. If Lex could avoid telling Lena about her origins, then there was a chance that the rest of the secrets could be safely shared. Time would tell.

 

. . .

 

 

Clark followed the light breeze through the darkened apartment to the open balcony doors. He found a solitary figure standing quietly at the railing, surveying the glittering lights of the city. It had been Lex's first night alone. Lena was at a friend's house for a few days, Rosella had a week off and Clark had a meeting he couldn't cancel. He walked up behind Lex and wrapped his arms around him, nuzzling the back of his neck.

"Meeting go well?"

Clark sighed. "Yes, I just needed to go over the plans for the next fundraiser. I'm sorry it took so long."

"That's all right. What is it for?"

"Metropolis Legal Aid. It's a non-profit firm you helped found when you were first starting out. You thought it was important for low-income families to have a chance for legal assistance. I've always helped with the fundraising along with a couple of other charities."

"Do I help too?"

Clark shook his head. "At the beginning, but then you were too busy working for your father. You really wanted that partnership, so you worked hard to get it and then you worked harder to keep it."

"Oh." Looking up into the night sky, Lex started to point out constellations. "There's Orion, and the Milky Way, the Big Dripper and the Little Dripper too."

Clark chuckled with delight at Lex recalling Lena's names for her favorites.

Lex turned around in Clark's arms. "It's funny how I can remember things like the names of stars, but forget important things like when you were born."

Clark smiled his sympathy, before teasing, "You know Lex, I never thought I'd see you wearing flannel. You always were one for designer fashion."

"I found it at the back of one of your drawers. I like it. It feels soft and...it smells like you."

Pleasantly surprised, Clark decided to take advantage of their childless state. "You know, we haven't made love since you came home." He started to unbutton the flannel barrier. "I know it's not because you can't, I've felt the proof of that against my hip or along my back every morning for the past couple of weeks."

Lex flushed and dropped his head shyly. "It's not that I haven't wanted to, it's just...well I saw a movie and...I'm not sure I could do it as good as that guy did."

Clark had finished Lex's shirt and had started on his own. He gathered Lex in close, enjoying the feel of the soft skin he had missed so much. He nibbled along the smooth jaw, enjoying the evidence of Lex's desire hard against his own. "I have a feeling this is one of those things you'll remember how to do once you start, kind of like riding a bicycle."

 

. . .

 

"Tell me how we met. Not the meteors, Pete already told me that one. Tell me about the first time after that, when I first knew you. "

The moonlight shone through the balcony doors, glimmering as it touched traces of passion, highlighting limbs intertwined on plush carpet. A pale hand caressed curls damp from exertion as two hearts slowly returned to steady rhythms.

"The story was always a surprise when people asked," Clark grinned. "You would tell them you hit me with your car on a bridge and the car went into the water..."

"...and an angel came and pulled me out and brought me back to life." Lex finished the story in wonder. "It wasn't a dream, was it? I thought I dreamed it. I was flying over green fields and a small town and then I saw your face and you were wet and your beautiful green eyes were so scared." Lex turned on his side and propped his head up with a bent elbow so he could look into Clark's moon-dappled face. "Tell me more. I want to remember more."

Clark was surprised when Lex failed to pursue Clark's statement that Lex had hit him with his car. He had been ready to tell Lex the truth, but this time around, Lex didn't seem to want to explore the accident further, leaving Clark's secret still intact. "You were in town for just a few days for a real estate closing, so I didn't expect to see you again, but it was your turn to save me the next night, when the football team strung me up on a cross in a cornfield. I think I might have died there if you hadn't found me and cut me down, so we then we were even. You left Smallville the next day and went back to Metropolis."

"So when did I teach you how to tie your tie? You said it was right before your prom, so I must have come back to Smallville?"

"The creamed corn factory went bankrupt and you were handling some of the legal mumbo-jumbo for it. I guess you were bored that night, so you drove out to the house to see the boy you *accidentally* met two years previously. You were just in time to rescue me from the clutches of the tie from hell."

"And then?"

"And then I didn't see you again until I was a junior at Met U. I was a waiter and you spent the night following me around and being a royal pain in the ass. I almost got fired because of you and your stage-whispered suggestions. You didn't even remember who I was, just that 'my face looked familiar'." Clark smiled at the memory.

"Then how in the world did we end up together?"

"I guess you realized just how obnoxious you'd been when you woke up the next day. It probably never helped that you didn't get hangovers; they might have slowed down your drinking and saved you a lot of next-day remorse. Anyway, I came back from class to find my dorm room *full* of roses and a very contrite note asking me to meet you for dinner at a four star restaurant that served an incredible Chateaubriand. We talked all night; all through dinner, dessert, a walk in the park and sitting in an all-night diner..."

"That served pie that wasn't as good as your mother's." Lex's face reflected his pleasure as Clark's reminiscing brought more of his past back to him. "We saw each other almost every day after that and you moved in with me three months later, despite my father's very strenuous objections." He fell silent, lost in thought.

Clark's hand began to trace the planes of the solemn face before him. "Would you like to visit Smallville sometime? See where we started?"

"Could we? Isn't it a long drive?"

"Not really, it's several hours, but we can spend the night and come back the following day. It will give me time to check over the house and make sure the mice haven't taken it over."

"House?"

"Yes, I still own the farmhouse. I couldn't bear to sell it after..."

Lex nodded enthusiastically. "I'd like that. Maybe we could go next weekend when Lena is back. We don't have to drive her out to Excelsior now, so..."

"Sounds like a plan." Clark rolled over and pinned Lex on his back, growling at him in good humor. "Now, we know you can ride a bicycle like a pro, let's see how you handle driving a Porsche."

 

. . .

 

Clark couldn't prevent a look of disbelief as Lex grabbed his hand and held it as they walked together in the park. When Lex caught sight of his face, he was puzzled. "What?"

"It's just that you never liked public displays of affection. They made you... uncomfortable."

Lex grinned at him and didn't release his hand. "Well, now I like them." He dragged Clark over to a nearby bench and climbed up on it, pulling Clark up and kissing him thoroughly. "What's wrong with showing the world I love my husband?"

Before Clark could answer, he was interrupted. "Clark? Lex?" An older woman walked up to them with her companion. "How good to see you both!"

"Hello, Nell, how are you? How's Lana?" Clark greeted her and stepped down from the bench.

"We're both fine. We'll be seeing both of you at my fundraiser, right?" It was obvious she was having difficulty keeping her curiosity in check. Clark knew Lex standing on the bench wasn't helping.

"We wouldn't miss it, it's a good cause. We'll see you then. Bye." With Clark's polite dismissal, Nell had no choice but to continue her walk, but she still turned around to look at them several times until she was out of sight.

"All right, now get back up here Husband, and let's enjoy some more public displays of affection." Lex leered at Clark, waggling his eyebrows comically.

A look of pain crossed Clark's face. "The only difficulty with that suggestion is...we're not married."

Lex climbed down from the bench slowly. "I guess that explains the missing rings. It must be another one of those questions I didn't know that I needed to ask."

 

. . .

 

"Jessica, can you please pull these files for me?"

"I'm sorry Mr. Luthor, but I can't."

"Why not?"

"I've been told not to bring you any more of your old case files."

 

. . .

 

"Why?"

Clark had been waiting for the question. He was surprised it had taken until now, that Lex waited until they lay together in the dark, when concealment was the normal state and secrets lived unseen. "Why aren't we married? To be honest, I never really understood or agreed with your reasons why you refused, both times that I asked you to marry me."

"Tell me. Please."

"At first, it simply wasn't legal. Later, when it was, you decided it wasn't something you needed, that your life worked fine the way it was. Legally, there were no concerns that marriage would resolve. Lena is the sole beneficiary in our wills, with the surviving parent acting as trustee until she comes of age. We both signed medical proxies and I've never needed your money, so if we separated there would be no question of a settlement. Marriage might have changed that according to you, make it harder for one of us to leave, raised the question on whether we should change our last names, and so on. I could only offer one good reason to get married, and it wasn't good enough for you."

"The reason?"

"I loved you and I wanted to be your husband."

"No more, tonight. Please. No more." There was a sense of frantic desperation in Lex's caresses and Clark knew that if he were human, he would have carried the marks for days.

 

. . .

 

The day had been quiet, each bound in their own thoughts, and when they encountered each other during the daily routine, their speech was gentle so as to prevent fracturing a fragile accord.

Now, they readied themselves in silence to venture back into the world.

"When we introduce ourselves, are we boyfriends?"

Their eyes met in the mirror and Clark saw how Lex stood braced, as if preparing for more pain. He didn't look away. "You never liked to use the words boyfriend, lover or partner. Each had its negatives for you. You simply supplied my name and left our relationship unstated." He shrugged. "I had no choice but to do the same. Sometimes I was lucky. I was 'Lena's other father'."

"And tonight?"

Clark could no longer bear the anguish in his eyes. He turned and folded Lex tenderly into his arms and whispered, "I am whatever you want me to be. Always."

 

. . .

 

As he made his way through the party, Clark stopped now and then to greet a potential sponsor. Clark soon spotted Lex by the fireplace, champagne glass in hand, conversing with a waiter. The waiter's serving tray was almost empty as Lex sampled the selections.

"...seven brothers and sisters in Memphis? Is it really hot in Memphis?"

The waiter nodded. "Really hot."

Clark came up behind Lex and murmured in his ear. "So you're up to your old tricks now, trying to pick up waiters?"

Lex turned around, pleased to see him. "Clark, there you are. This is Redmond. Redmond, this is my boyfriend, Clark."

Clark gave a polite bow, as the waiter's hands were both occupied. "It's very nice to meet you, Redmond." Looking pointedly at Lex's empty glass, he asked, "How are *you* doing?"

Smiling, Lex pointed to the tray Redmond was still holding. "Oh, these little ones are really good, but that lady over there thinks they're a disaster." He pointed. "And that other woman over there, near the window, just had her face done. Not the neck, just her eyes." Turning, he indicated another area of the room. "And the man over there used to be her husband and he said 'Who is she kidding, the damage is done'."

No longer able to resist, Clark let out a bark of laughter at his *boyfriend* who had imbibed just a little too much champagne and was absolutely adorable. "OK, I think that we've enjoyed ourselves enough tonight. Why don't I take my boyfriend home and see what fun we can have there?" He placed Lex's empty glass on the tray, bid Redmond a good evening, and tucked Lex's arm under his as he looked around for the hostess. Seeing her with a small group by the window, they headed in that direction.

"Such a shame really, I mean he was so good."  
"Lex represented my cousin three years ago, he was the best, they were all terrified."  
"Of course I've known Clark forever."  
"I heard he's back at work."  
"Yeah, but doing what? Sharpening pencils?"  
"Getting paid for doing nothing, doesn't sound too bad does it."  
"God, one minute you're an attorney, the next you're an imbecile."  
"That's not a very long trip."

"It's Clark I feel sorry for, it's like he has two kids now. I mean, what does he have to look forward to?" Nell looked up to see Clark and Lex standing there. They had obviously heard the cruel gossip she and her friends were indulging in.

Clark recovered first. "Nell, I just wanted to let you know we won't be staying for the auction. Good night."

Clark and Lex were out the door before Nell managed to squeak, "Good night."

 

. . .

 

"You can't let them hurt you, Lex. They don't know you anymore."

"I'm not going to work today."

"You know I love you, right?"

"I don't want to talk right now."

 

. . .

 

"Lex, I invited someone over."

A grumble issued from the rumpled bedclothes and a pillow thrown in the general direction of the door. "Go away."

"Nice. And here I was, keeping my promise to visit." A familiar laugh brought Lex's head up from the depths of the bed.

"Pete!"

 

. . .

 

After a shower and clean clothes, Lex met Pete in the study. He handed a cold beer to his guest.

After an appreciative swallow, Pete raised an eyebrow. "Thanks. So what's up?"

Head down, Lex began peeling the label off the bottle he held. "I thought I could go back to my life, but I don't like who I was, Pete." He sighed. "I don't fit in."

Pete sat back in his chair and took another sip. "I've got bad knees."

Lex's head came up, baffled at the change in subject. "What?"

"My knees, they're bad." Pete waved his bottle. "Ask me why."

"Why?"

Leaning forward again, he confided, "Football. Wrecked them both playing college football." He nodded. "Man, it was my life. Football, what else was there? Not jack shit." He paused for another sip. "Homecoming, right? That son of a bitch threw a perfect spiral and I caught it, *boom* , right out of the sky. I had the moment." Pete's hands cradled an invisible ball. "When that safety hit me and I felt my knees pop, I knew that was it. Game over, forget it, I was dead. My life was over, Lex." He sat back and gestured with his bottle. "Now ask me if I mind having bad knees."

"Do you..."

Pete jumped up before Lex could finish. "No. No way. It was a test. I had to find a life." He walked to the window and looked out. "The therapist that helped me walk again, he was so cool, I thought, 'that's what I'm going to do'. When I told some of my buddies, they laughed right in my face, called me a nurse, bought me white dresses, gave me a lot of shit." Leaving the window, he came back and laid his hand on Lex's shoulder. "But check it out. You're walking, you're talking, and you're sitting here drinking some fine imported beer." He laughed. "I had something to do with that. If it weren't for my knees, I wouldn't have had that chance." Sitting down again, he leaned forward and looked straight into Lex's eyes. "Don't listen to nobody trying to tell you who you are. It might take a while, but you'll figure yourself out."

Lex looked back at Pete for a few seconds, and then reached forward to touch his bottle to Pete's. "Thanks." They both upended their bottles and finished them off.

Pete laughed. "It'd be a great story if we won the game."

In the kitchen, Clark and Lena smiled at each other in relief.

 

. . .

 

"I'm going to have to leave now, but it was great seeing you both. Maybe I'll see you at Bruce's next party. Tell Lena I expect to hear all about her school trip to Washington." Lex watched Diana pocket the small device she had just checked as she stood to leave. He was positive he had seen something like it before.

"I'll walk you down." Clark opened the door for Diana and followed her out. "I'll be back in a couple of minutes, Lex."

Lex started carrying the dirty dishes into the kitchen when he recalled where he had seen that device before. Bruce had one just like it...and so did they. He dropped the dishes on the table and headed for their bedroom closet.

He found it in the second drawer he checked. As he pulled it out, he looked at the crumpled corner and saw himself throwing it at Clark, who was standing in front of him. Clark's face had dirt or mud on it and he was saying he was sorry that he had missed...a party? He was yelling at Clark, telling him he'd had enough of his excuses. The device...hit Clark...he had hit Clark...he was yelling....

Lex dropped the device and sank to his knees shaking. The open drawer pulled out and clattered to the floor. When he looked at the cabinet, he saw the gleam of metal that had been concealed. Drawn to it, he crawled close enough to see a keypad imbedded in the surface. The smell of roses drifted in from his subconscious and he keyed in a date...that first night of discovery, when they had watched the sun rise together, reluctant to say goodbye.

And the safe opened.

 

. . .

 

"Lex? What are you..."

Lex looked up from the floor of the closet where he had spread out the contents of the safe. The two travel pouches spilled cash and the identification for 3 people, two sets each of birth certificates, Social Security cards, driver's licenses, and adoption paperwork. Lex didn't recognize the names, but that was the point after all. He held up the communication device and the blue suit, leaving the red cape dangling from the safe. His voice was hoarse. "Were you *ever* going to tell me?"

"Lex, I promised I would tell you the truth, whatever you asked me."

"How could you keep this from me? What *else* don't I remember? What do I have to do before you can trust me?" Lex was shouting as he rose to his feet, his anger at the secrecy almost more than he could take. "Did you think I would betray you, endanger Lena?"

"It wasn't like that Lex. I wanted to tell you. But..."

"I can't do this, Clark. I can't live like this anymore, never knowing what I'm going to find out next and how bad it was before." Lex gritted out his next words through clenched teeth. "And it was very bad according to you, wasn't it, Clark? Except I...don't...remember...what I was like...*before*!"

Clark's shoulders slumped. "We were in love, years ago, but then you began to hate Superman, hated that I wouldn't stop *being* Superman for you. I cut back my patrols; got the rest of the League to cover for me as much as possible, but it wasn't enough for you. It was all or nothing. It didn't help that I was losing you to your father's lies and corrupt legal tricks, that you forgot those ideals that were so important once." He reached for Lex, who stepped back. "I still stayed with you, Lex, because you knew me, I didn't have to keep secrets from you. I needed that, a connection with *normal*. I didn't want to leave Lena either. Finally we both just lived here, but not together, just tolerating each other for Lena's sake. Even that was failing; Lena was hurting too much, so I was going to tell you we were leaving that night." The tears were making it hard for him to continue. "We're better now. We love each other again. Please don't walk away from this, from us. Please. I love you. I'll do whatever it takes. Please."

Lex looked at Clark, looked at his trembling hands, looked at the tears and shook his head. He pushed by Clark and walked out of the closet, grabbing his jacket on the way. He headed for the apartment door.

"Lex?"

"I can't think in here. It's all too jumbled. I need to go out."

"I'll go with you."

"No!" Lex backed towards the door and made a visible effort to calm himself. "No, I need to be alone. Don't follow me. Don't listen to me. Don't watch me." He glared at Clark. "You *know* what I mean, right?"

Clark nodded. "When will you be back?"

"I don't know, but if I find out you've spied on me..."

"I won't. I promise. Just...be careful, please. I don't think I could handle...you..."

A short jerk of his head and Lex was gone and Clark was on his knees and the only sound, whispers. "I'm sorry. Please come back. I'm sorry. Please come back. I'm sorry..."

 

. . .

 

"Mr. Luthor is there something..." Jessica watched as her employer walked into his office and re-emerged with a file under his arm. "...I can do for you?"

"No, Jessica. I've had enough and I'm saying 'When'."

She patted him arm and said, "Good for you, Mr. Luthor. Good for you."

 

. . .

 

Lex looked out the hotel window, not sure what he expected to see or why he was here. He hadn't been paying attention to where he was walking and somehow ended up in front of the Ritz Grand, one of the nicer hotels in downtown Metropolis. Obeying an impulse, he booked a room and now he was waiting for...something. His introspection was interrupted by several knocks and frowning at the disturbance, he opened the door.

"Victoria?"

Unwilling to wait for Lex to invite her inside, Victoria pushed by to sit on the bed. "I followed you from the office."

Lex still held the door open, puzzled at her presence. "I don't know why you're here."

"I think we should talk."

He frowned. "I don't. This is not a good time for me."

Victoria snapped back, "Well, this isn't any fun for me either, Lex."

Lex finally let the door close. "What are you talking about?"

Victoria wiped away a tear that escaped. "I'm talking about us. You're not the only one who lost part of his life. I lost too." She looked away, unable to look at Lex as she continued. "I lost the one man I loved. It's you, Lex." Another tear fell unnoticed. "It's hard to see you every day in the office and you don't know me." She rose and walked to the window. "This was our hotel. Every Tuesday and Thursday at the Ritz."

Lex gasped. "Ritz! Oh, God...."

Victoria left the window and walked towards Lex. "You were going to leave Clark for me. Now it's gone, it's all gone."

Shaking his head, Lex backed away and fumbled the door open.

"Lex..."

He was gone before she could say another word.

 

. . .

 

Lex stood in front of the door in the aging brownstone for a long time before knocking. He didn't recognize the woman who answered the door or the man in the wheelchair in the room behind her. "Mrs. Matthews?"

"May I help..." Her friendly face hardened. "What are you doing here?"

Lex winced. "You remember me."

"Oh, we remember you. Mr. Luthor." Her voice grated with anger.

"I came to apologize."

"Are you kidding me?"

Lex hastened to assure her, "No, I'm serious." He handed the file to her. "Here, you need to take this to your attorney."

"What is it?"

Lex dropped his eyes in shame. "Your husband did tell the nurse he was diabetic. It's all in there." He straightened up and looked at Mrs. Matthews, then offered his apology. "I'm sorry."

She looked at the file and then back at him, suspicious.

"Why?"

He shrugged. "I've changed."

She nodded. "I guess so."

 

. . .

 

The door opened as he fumbled with his key, his hands full.

"Lex!"

He couldn't see very well around the four dozen roses he was carrying, but it sounded like Clark was happy to see him.

"Can I come in?"

Clark stammered his apologies for blocking the door and Lex maneuvered the over-large bouquet into the apartment.

"Can you take these?"

"Sure." Clark lifted the roses carefully from his arms and placed them in a nearby chair. "Beautiful."

Lex nodded, staring at the man in front of him. "Sure are. Clark, I know I've been obnoxious and a royal pain in the ass, but could I make it up to you and take you to this four star restaurant I know that serves an incredible Chateaubriand and then maybe afterwards we could take a walk and possibly end up at a diner that serves pie..."

He never got to finish his request for a date because he was in Clark's arms, kissing him back, giving him everything he had, everything he was or would be. They sank to the floor, unwilling to move away from each other long enough to do more than open zippers or push aside shirts. It was over quickly, frantic touches, the need for reassurance bringing them to breathless completion. They lay there, still connected, caresses now gentle where they had been fevered.

"Lex?"

"Hmm."

"Why don't we order pizza instead?"

"Perfect."

 

. . .

 

"Lena's back tomorrow."

"Good. I miss her."

"We still haven't made it out to Smallville."

"Let's leave right after she gets home. We'll spend the weekend."

"Sounds good."

"Clark?"

"Yeah?"

"You know those ID packets in the safe?"

"Yeah?"

"They're missing something."

"They are?"

"Marriage certificates."

"Oh."

"I think we should get that taken care of as soon as possible."

"OK."

"I love you, Clark."

"I love you too, Lex. Thank you for coming back."

"Thank you for waiting."

 

***

 

Epilogue

 

***

 

Lex closed the door of the storefront behind him and headed for the truck parked at the curb. He got in and kissed Nathan's chubby cheek before leaning over to bestow another on Clark's lips.

"How'd it go?"

"Great, we picked up another grower from the southern part of the county. Before you know it the Kent-Luthor Organic Cooperative is going to actually start making a profit!"

Clark laughed at Lex's sarcastic remark. He knew his husband loved the challenge. "Lena's making dinner. I'll have to leave right afterwards. I told Bruce I'd cover Gotham City for him tonight so he can make nice with some financiers from Japan."

"Say hello to Diana for me, if you see her, and remind her she hasn't seen her godson in weeks."

"Sure. How about you meet me in the barn when I get home and I'll make it worth your while. I'll bring pie from a diner I know..."

"And we'll watch the sun come up. It's a date." Lex sat back and relaxed, looking forward to a quiet evening in a little yellow farmhouse.

Lex had been given a second chance to get it right and when Clark offered to give up the world for him, Lex refused.

He might not remember the exact dates or the specific words she used, but he was pretty sure his mother had taught him to share. He wasn't going to forget how this time.


End file.
